Falling Back In Love
7 August, 2008
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Relationships are not static or easy. They are complicated and need constant and mutual efforts in order to function well and maintain their spark.
Every marriage travels trough love and disillusionment
There are times that we feel lonely and mad at our partner. Routine, boredom, increasing responsibilities and life problems can affect romance and communication.
Understanding and accepting the differences reduce tensions and resentment.
Every partnership is about respect, acceptance and mutual compromising. We can’t expect our partner to be always perfect and available or to agree with us at all times.
Don’t major on the minors. Resist the temptation of making a big deal out of something unimportant. Constant nagging, bickering and holding grudges are a major turn off.
Dedicating time and energy to each other. Life is unpredictable and there are many things you can’t control (money worries, kids, lack of time) but the one thing you both can control is attention and affection you show towards others.
Passion, fun and trust require commitment, honest communication, but mainly the willingness to stay in love.
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Letter - The absentee breakup |
I was dating this guy for 4 weeks and things were great between us…We talked about meeting up on a Saturday and go to a party together. He was supposed to call me and let me know about the details. He never did on that day. I tried to ring him but his phone was off all day .Next day I sent him a text message and tried to ring him again. This time, his phone was ringing but he never answered my call. I sent him a few other text messages asking if he was okay, .He equally ignored my messages. Then, after 4 days, he dumped me by email, a short dismissive email- and I never responded to it. But I am gutted and I wonder if it would be a good idea to tell him what a coward he is. |
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In situations like yours, rather than trying to track him down for endless days by calling, texting and sending long, worried emails, let him contact you, do all the explanation, and chase thing. If a man disappears and ignores you- Ignore him too and move on. Ignoring may sound cold but is better sometimes to be a little cold than to be walked over and played around. Dumping someone by email is simply heartless and unforgivable it shows that he is not the right guy for you anyway but it gives you an additional reason to get over him quickly. A man who has so little consideration for a woman is not definitely worthy of your tears and your time. I wouldn’t bother to waste more time and send him an angry email .Resist the temptation to give him that satisfaction. |
Letter - Second Thoughts |
I’ve been married for 16 years and some time ago, my husband told me that he is still in love with an ex. He said that she was the love of his life and he wants a divorce, as things between us are not good anymore. I was completely shattered and felt that he probably never loved me. Now he seems to have regretted what he has done and he wants back. I am hurt and confused but I still love him and we have 2 lovely kids together. |
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It must have been hard on you. A Huge shock, a lot pain and confusion. I’ve heard many similar stories and it seems that some men have the need to feel sexually important and desired. An old flame will always remind them the passion and the lost excitement .The “first love” can be an excuse to recapture the lost youth and justify the end of a marriage with problems.
I can’t guess the exact reason your husband wanted to leave you but given that he wants to come back to you, it could be that your marriage was in trouble. Sometimes we love dearly our partner but we get out of the habit of showing him. There was a good reason that his behaviour was part of a mid life crisis. If you can think of reasons why this may happened to you, you can try to address them.
If you decide to get back together, you have to do a lot of talking. |
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I can’t imagine life without my girlfriend. She has everything I have looked for and I am sure she will be my future wife. However, there is a huge problem. My sex drive is just fine but it seems to disappear every time there is the possibility of having sex with her. |
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Sex is a vitally important part of a balanced relationship because it is more than hormones and a pleasant sort of exercise. Sex reveals a lot about the trust and the psychological, mental and emotional compatibility of a couple. Perhaps a mental issue is making you to shut down and is worth exploring the issue with a qualified therapist.
Be honest with yourself and don’t get too worried if your girlfriend is your future wife or not.
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